Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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