My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
Can you please stop fucking every bartender in the city? Just once I want to have a Jack and Coke without fielding questions about your availability.
Randomize