just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize