she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I just deleted all the drug dealers from my phone, I guess this is growing up
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
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