just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
