The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Randomize
