new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
At McDonald's last night the guy gave you the wrong kind of McFlurry, so you screamed at him, "YOU MCFUCKED UP."
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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