Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
