dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
