It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
This is the prime rib incident all over again
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
