So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
