I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
