The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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