So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
