kristin has been a bad kristin
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Randomize
