I am puke
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
Randomize