I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
