I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
my favorite homeless guy just told me I drive like Batman, achievement unlocked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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