Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
Like a gentleman I waited until you were done vomming to start my Big Mac.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
Randomize
