I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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