Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
