I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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