He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
