You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
I don't know if it has occurred to you yet, but you are dating a nymphomaniac, and your work schedule is an interference of my needs being fulfilled. Get home now.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
