There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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