Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize