bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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