I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
