OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
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got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
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Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
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