In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
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