whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
What do you want me to say to her? "Oh hey, I need to borrow your soon to be husband to make a porn, cool?"
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Alive.
So much puke
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Randomize
