i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
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