yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
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You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
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But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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