We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
Randomize
