I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
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