take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
