i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
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Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
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And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
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