Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
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