: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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