Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
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