Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
Randomize
