dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
