I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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