I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
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