Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
