I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Randomize
