He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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