don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
