You were right. It hurts to walk today.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
