I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
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He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
It looked like Halloween in bed... BECAUSE HE BIT MY PUSSY AND I BLED ALL OVER THE FUCKING PLACE. THEN HE FELL AND BROKE HIS TOE. AND THEN PASSED OUT WHEN HE SAW ALL OF THE BLOOD.
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
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