im drinking this country out of the recession.
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
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