I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Watching her eat just hurts me
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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